One of the most befuddling questions in modern life is how critics can LOVE movies that most of us HATE. Latest example: “One Battle After Another.” The critics and the awards people say nothing but good things about “Battle.” But it failed at the box office.
Let’s imagine that unknown actors had been cast in “Battle” instead of Leonardo DiCaprio, Sean Penn and Benicio del Toro. Let’s further imagine that the unknowns were just as skilled as the stars. Would this movie have been noticed by anyone except their mothers?
Short summary of the film: A former hippie revolutionary (some would call him a domestic terrorist) leaves his politically risky life to raise his daughter, Willa, who has been abandoned by her mother. For years Bob (DiCaprio) and Willa (Chase Infiniti) live in poverty and obscurity. Bob stays stoned enough to be droopy but not so droopy he can’t be a halfway-decent father. When Willa becomes a difficult teen-ager, Bob also faces the reappearance of the evil colonel, Steven Lockjaw (Sean Penn). Lockjaw repeatedly raped Willa’s mother, so there’s an open question about Willa’s paternity. Lockjaw isn’t concerned about the paternity issue. He wants Bob, his escaped revolutionary, dead – and maybe Willa also.
There’s no question that the acting is superior in this film. Penn’s Lockjaw is especially phenomenal. He’s the personification of a crazy, weird military mind-gone-sour. He even walks uptight. I found myself squinting hard to see if his butt cheeks were pinched while he executed his bizarre walk. Penn is the comedian in this film, but his mission of murder steals the fun (and Lockjaw is a not-so-hidden dig at political conservatives).
The chase scenes are original, showing the action from the driver’s wheel instead of outside the car – a creative perspective which is realisticallynauseating. This is what it’s really like when you drive over hill and dale at 100 mph.
The “dark comedy” isn’t very funny. DiCaprio’s scene trying to get information when he can’t remember his secret password is the only one that made me do anything but scowl. It would be funny if Bob Hope was on the phone. It’s not as amusing when an ugly, disheveled, scrambled, totally unappealing character does it. Viewers have to care enough about characters to cry – or laugh — with them.
I’m not saying the film shouldn’t be done. It’s a free country. But it’s an art film, not an entertaining movie the public is willing to pay for. The characters are unappealing and shallow. The plot is simplistic. The moral of the story is – what? Not there. The movie is an exercise in watching a group of unsavory characters (del Toro’s character is the possible exception) deal with a chaotic life they themselves created. Who cares what they do to each other? Willa is a rather nice teen-ager, but the conclusion makes us wonder.
Hollywood is in a curious stage, pun intended. Movies and TV are either vacuous beyond description or they are like “Battle,” no there there, simply bad slices of life. Viewers are asked to view these moldy slices for up to $20 a pop. Movie-goers are not coming through. It’s not like watching Jimmy Stewart’s George Bailey in “It’s a Wonderful Life.” Bailey was suicidal, which is not fun, but his good angel appears to set him right. And, in the end, Bailey and the viewer learn some heartwarming lessons about what really matters in life.
We don’t learn anything from “Battle.” Embattled, messed-up Bob remains stoned, messed-up Bob. Who cares?
